hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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