We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
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After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
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you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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