So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
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No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
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CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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