Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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