I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just invented taco cereal.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize