I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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