a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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