i wish peter jackson would direct porn
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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