Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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