So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize