Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize