thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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