She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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