my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
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While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
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Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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