That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
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Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
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And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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