Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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