whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
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