i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize