I'm drive I can fine osifer
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize