under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize