How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize