put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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