would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
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