"it" just moved
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize