I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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