I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
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