i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
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