I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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