I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
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I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
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No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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