Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize