I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize