life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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