If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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