her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize