i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize