One girl and one boy is just not enough.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
did i just pee glitter
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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