So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
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We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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