My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize