She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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