watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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