just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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