i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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