Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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