Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I think people are normalizing furries
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize