I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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