But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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