dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize