I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I have tasted many bathrooms
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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