There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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