I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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